Today I had a wonderful massage from the sister of a friend of mine who's visiting from Mexico--Mexico, Mexico, not Mexico, MO as some might think! This woman is a wonderful healer and spiritual teacher and this was my second massage with her. She does chakra work and is just a pleasure to be around. She goes home on Monday and I will miss having a chance to learn from her. Today she gave me lots of new information to consider...things that might work in the healing arena here at the B&B. It will be interesting to see what develops, and I expect she'll be someone who is a presence in my life in the future as well... It's so interesting that the more one learns about 'becoming awake,' the more one understands that all paths of consciousness come from and lead back to the same source. It's really fascinating! 

Taking a quick break from preparing dinner--made a nice oven parmesan. I'm really getting into my 'cooking' these days--I'd forgotten how much I enjoyed it!! 

I'm considering taking down my blog--seriously.--not sure anyone reads it anyway, and when it does get read, it's usually something I wish I'd never written! It's probably wiser for me to keep handwritten journals and then burn them every year! What I'd really like to do is start a B&B blog, where I just write about mundane things like how to cook breakfast and what makes running an inn fascinating! Or maybe it's time to completely reinvent myself and start a new blog on something like spirituality or gardening or herbal remedies! 

The weather's been perfect, the guests were easy and interesting, and I had a really good writer's meeting in Columbia yesterday, followed by a nice evening with Jim. It's a beautiful day today as well, guests coming in, and I'm looking forward to the week ahead, though it promises to be a busy one... All is well in my world...

I'm having a Friday evening of Lemoncella and polishing off a writers Guild project that's been on my plate for WAAAYYY too long! The Lemoncella is making it quite enjoyable! All the guests are in, the project is done, and life is actually good at the moment! Not a bad way to spend a Friday evening, even if I am spending it alone! 

It's getting late so I'll keep this short, but I wanted to try and keep on a roll! Sometimes I'm just so tired by the end of the day that I don't want to look at the computer anyway. But I just came back from my meditation group in Columbia so I guess I'm still a bit 'energized' though mellow. Tonight the facilitator talked about the idea that enlightenment is really just being free from suffering. But most of us aren't able to attain that state because we're too attached to our emotions and thoughts. It's not that you will never feel emotion--fear, sadness, anger--but the idea is to feel it and let it go, rather than be attached to it... Not so easy to do, but as I try to put this into practice, I'm finding it really does bring peace into one's life. It's along the same ideas as Eckhart Tolle's books, which I find myself referring to a lot. Thanks goodness I've found all this now, at this time when I particularly need it. I wonder how much of it is also the wisdom of age, just being able to see what you've done in the past, and wanting to do things differently, hoping for a better outcome. 

Well, it's been almost 3 weeks since my last post, and this is largely because a lot of transitional stuff is happening in my life. It's hard but it's okay too. One day at a time I am finding my way, remembering who I am, becoming 'care-free.' A friend told me I should view this as an opportunity, and at the time, it made me a bit angry because of course I'm 'feeling' a lot of 'feelings' about the changes in my life. But my friend is right--it IS an opportunity to get in touch with myself again, to do things for ME. But it's also a time to start saying goodbye to things as well. I realized how much of the past I've carried around with me for the past 20 years, and how heavy that burden has become, and perhaps how much it's cost me in the greater scheme of things. So last night, I cleaned out my trunk and burned most of the old cards and letters I've kept there--letters from my ex, cards and letters from Jim, letters from previous loves in my life. It wasn't a rash decision--I've been considering it for some time, but once it's gone, it's gone, and I wanted to be sure. Oh, I kept a very few things, good things, things that reminded me of how I was loved, and of the growth work I'd done and forgotten. But the bulk of it is GONE! The beauty is, I feel free now, free to be open to whatever may come my way in the days, months, and years ahead. Free to be brave, to do things I've always wanted to do, but have been too burdened to try. Now there is a space for something wonderful in my life, and I wait with eagerness to discover what it may be.

It is so nice to finally have some warm weather and to be able to work in the yard! It was lovely today, and in spite of feeling low, I managed to keep busy. I worked outside, did some stuff to finish Well Versed, almost finished my taxes, did some laundry...got lots accomplished for a Sunday! Not sure what I'm doing this evening--there's some good TV on, or I might use the hot tub, or light the chimenea...Overall I'm tired, and no guests, so hoping for a good long night's sleep. I've been waking up a lot lately, and I'd like to sleep one night through... Ah, stress!

Guess that's obvious...besides taking a long weekend to see a friend and retreat, just haven't had much good news to write lately. Not personally, anyway. Today I did get some from a friend--she's been dealing with cancer and her latest report shows it's GONE! I am so happy for her, and hopefully she can begin to put her life back together now. She was really ill for a while. And my mom had her last chemo treatment last week, and she's doing great too, so there is definitely some good news.  I'm afraid I'm having a bit of a low night, so I'll keep this one short... 

These days when I manage to blog two days in a row it's a good thing...Today was sort of a bad day that managed to get better by the end, thank goodness. It's gray, rainy, and still cold here, and it's almost April--hard to believe! Will Spring never come?!! I did manage to get my walk in, because it was actually warmer this morning that it is now! Yuk--oh, and here comes the thunder signifying more rain--yeah! At least it wasn't raining earlier when I had to take my car over to Columbia for its oil change--and the good news there was that it didn't cost as much as I thought... I only had to do the oil change and a tire rotation, no other maintenance. I was expecting a lot more--and who would have thought, but labor at the Subaru dealer is much cheaper than it is with Honda--I am starting to like this car more and more!!! I also managed to get a bit of shopping for my booth done over there at a little flea market I like, so all in all a good trip. <br><br>Tomorrow I have to work on my taxes and get a room done before I leave town for a few days. I'm off Kansas City to see my friend who's the daughter of the Jamesons, which should be nice, and then to visit Unity Village, where I've always wanted to go. Am looking forward to seeing a some new things and places... Will try to blog if I have wireless where I'm staying...