Oh, my gosh, I swear it thundered and lightning(ed) from midnight until mid-morning. No way of sleeping. The AC went off, the smoke alarm went off, the cats went nuts--it was a crazy night, and I couldn't sleep anyway. Tonight I'm taking drugs and hopefully will sleep through anything! I had guests in the house too--they're here tonight, but we all agreed to move breakfast till 9, so I can sleep in for a bit. Man, what a night!

Today, however, I did manage to get some work done, editing-wise, and then had a dinner package tonight, so it's been a busy day, all in all. Hope to spend a bit of time in the hot tub before packing it in--EARLY!

Tomorrow I have guests checking in, and lunch with a friend, and maybe a jewelry party at another friends, if I can make it. I have to get a book transmittal finished, and I REALLY want to fit my workout in there somewhere...

I just found this amazing streaming music radio station that I love. Nothing like music to keep the soul happy. My soul has felt pretty happy today, in spite of the fact that I felt exhausted most of the day. Lots of anxiety too, but I'm working on it, one day at a time...

Nothing really special about it, but I got a good night's sleep, and then went to work out, and then got some work done this afternoon. Guests are here tonight, which is good, and I can't say why, but I feel things are starting to look up. Now if the weather were just a bit cooler!! It's very humid and very hot--not a pleasant combination. Still, I did get out and do some watering, and we've had lots of rain, so hopefully everything won't die due to my neglect. Anyway, I'll keep this short, but it was nice to actually feel like my old self for a change. Or my new self who maybe I'm starting to like.

Went out with a friend, over to a little town on the river called Rocheport, where we had dinner at a cute little restaurant called Abigail's, then went to a winery overlooking the river for a drink before heading home. There was a nice breeze, and even though it's warm here, it was a lovely evening. Good conversation and just a really nice evening. She and I have lots in common--love of all things Arthurian, good wine, books, movies--really enjoyed our visit!

The rest of the day was so-so. Went to workout at the Y, then called a couple of friends. Found out today that a guy I know here died of a heart attack this week--only 54 years old, a great historian whose work wasn't even half finished. Life doesn't seem fair sometimes, and is just way too short. I need to get back to my own writing... Time to stop wasting time. Time to start moving forward again, even if the steps are painful. Movement makes the muscles stronger.

Anyway, that pretty much sums up my day. I'm hoping to take a bike ride in the morning, if I can get moving before it gets too hot! I want to see if I have any better stamina after all this working out. I could even tell today that I was doing better with the weights, so I suppose I AM making progress... Ta-Ta for now...

Met with a group of women in Jeff City today, a spirituality book club but really more of a discussion group and met 4 really amazing women. Felt so supported and finally a community of women I could really relate to--oddly enough, most have lived in CA at some point or another, and one was from Burbank/Glendale area! Maybe that's why we all felt so connected! I had put that intention out, and have been looking and looking, so am so glad I finally found this group!

In the meantime, it's been another relatively slow week at the B&B, and no bookings this weekend, though I'm still hoping for some calls. Although tomorrow IS Friday! No matter, next week it's picking up, which is good, and I know things will get better soon. Maybe I've just needed this 'down' time to do some processing of sorts...

Guess that's about it for the moment...

Even in the midst of some frustrations, I have to say I pulled off a good one today. I've been cleaning and getting rid of stuff, which always feels good, and have kept busy most of the day. Took a walk this morning and even though I stayed home otherwise, I've felt ok, gotten stuff done and had some good 'processing' time. This is the first day I've really been able to think about ME, which I want for the days ahead, and it has actually felt good. Knowing I don't have to really DO anything, I like that feeling. I like feeling like it's all about ME for a change. Who knows how long it will last, but for now, it feels good.

So tonight, after I nice dinner I made just for ME, I'm going to watch a DVD and do some ironing. I'd love to have some bookings for the weekend, which I don't at the moment, but I'm sending out positive vibes in the hope that some come through in the next day or so... July has been terribly slow, and I really would like things to pick up. I need the stimulation by the weekend...

Anyway, that's it for now...

I'm trying to keep up with the blogging routine, and have no excuses since I have NO guests this weekend! It's hard though, I just don't want to write. My life seems dull and confused at the moment, unfortunately. Just don't have much enthusiasm for anything, and the best thing I can do for myself is find distractions, but writing doesn't seem to be one of them... Wish it was.

Went to a friend's tonight and watched a good movie, THE JANE AUSTEN BOOK club. I've seen several good ones lately, IRA AND ABBY was great, but my favorite was AUGUST RUSH. I watched it 2 nights in a row it was so good. Haven't done THAT in a while!!

May try to hit some garage sales tomorrow and one auction...need to try and pick up some new stuff for my booth. It's doing pretty good this month since I moved it to a new spot...a cheaper spot, too, so that helps. I'll try to keep it going a bit longer, if possible. Tomorrow night am supposed to go out to dinner with friends in Columbia.

Started my new workout routine at the Y by myself today. It's hard, lots of free weights and a lot more challenging that what I had before. But the change is good for me, pushing my comfort  zone, like a lot of my life is doing lately. While I know that's a good thing, right now I'm feeling pretty angry about it! Still, this too shall pass...

I can't seem to keep my blogging act together, though the good news is that I've actually been writing again.Trying to work on my 'house' memoir...it's coming slowly, but it's coming... At least it's something.

Life hasn't been at its best lately, but for the past few days I've actually felt like I'm pulling myself together. I would say if you're a friend, and you haven't heard from me in a while, call me and I'll fill you in on my life. It's not really for public consumption at the moment.

Things have been slow B&B wise too, and this weekend I have NO guests at all which isn't good. In fact, that reminds me I need to call and confirm a couple of bookings, so I'll go do that now. Planning to head off to watch a movie with a friend tonight... I'll try to get a big more regular, I promise.

I'm off shortly to spend the evening with a couple of friends--I'm looking forward to it. The one whose house we're going to lives on a beautiful wooded lot with limestone bluffs behind. It's a fabulous spot, and though it is a little rainy, I'm sure it will still be lovely, and more lovely over wine with friends. We're going to plan a book-signing for my new book, GLASS HOURS, and I'm hoping my friend, who has a jewelry store, will do a window display. I think it would be kind of fun to pair romance with jewelry--can't think of 2 better things personally!

I'm feeling almost normal lately...would love to stay in this place, but I'm sure I'll slip into depression again at some point. Went to Columbia today, got the car serviced, then met with a new counselor. She gave me homework, which was stuff I'd been planning to do anyway, so this will keep me motivated! Nothing like someone else wanting something to spur one into action.

While it wasn't a busy B&B weekend, I managed to stay busy. Spent all of Sunday doing 'work' around the house...lots of weeding and cleaned the garage, which it desperately needed. Found some poison ivy in the flower bed and hopefully managed to rid myself of it before it took hold. Sure hate to see it turn up in the flower bed, of all places. But Missouri is know for its poison ivy, and so it's bound to crop up. The trick is to knock it out before it takes over!!

So today I got to sleep in a bit, after having to get up early for several days in a row. Got some work done, took a walk--the weather is still AMAZING--and worked in a yoga class this afternoon. Also got one of the PolySci books transmitted, which means I should be able to get MONEY for it sooner rather than later! Yeah!

Tonight I'm going to curl up with a movie, which I haven't done in a while. I got 2 rooms done today, but have to finish Renaissance still. Anyway, I'm ahead of the game, and so far the weekend looks pretty quiet. Alas! Sure need to get business to pick up!!